I don’t know…

I don’t know..
The wisest claim anybody can say is “I don’t know…”. but it is also the most painful one.
We don’t like not to know anything. We prefer to have control of our lives by assuming that we “know” things.  Because we believe that having control brings happiness.  Or does it?   But we simply don’t know a lot of things.  And it scares us.
Will there ever be a cure to cancer? We don’t know, and it hurts us. Many people in my personal life has been diagnosed with this disease, and it is almost like a death sentence. Will we be able to overcome this monster?
I don’t know.
Are we facing a global catastrophe with all the earthquakes and freezing storms we are facing lately?
I don’t know.
I don’t know about you, but I am petrified by the thought of facing my own mortality. I thought I was beginning to accept and welcome death, but it is becoming more imminent, and it scares me.
It is becoming a hard and cold truth with no happy end in sight.
Is it our destiny to be happy? Or is it to simply accept the insignificance of this existence? Are we getting anywhere?
I don’t know.
Maybe we are facing a new stage of human consciousness where we are beginning to embrace uncertainty, and simply live the present moment the way it is.
Because, after all, the fear and the depression that I am experiencing lately is simply caused by my expectation of life. I expect to be happy, I expect to find meaning to this chaotic life. I expect to be immortal.
But I may not be…
I don’t know.
Does the self even exist?
Or is the self part of a bigger “organism”, like a single cell is part of a whole body?
I don’t know.

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About Noel

I am a person who has realized that the teachings of Jesus are centralized in the genuine care and service of others. I have evolved from fundamentalism to a moderate spiritual approach. I am a reflecting person who has grown to not fear doubt but to embrace it as a means to growth and increasing closeness to God. View all posts by Noel

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