To Give Up or Not to Give Up?

signsSurrender or fight? Pick my battles or be consistent?  This might be a different kind of post than previous ones, or maybe not. Me and my wife have been dealing with a difficult situation.  It involves the horrible experience of having to give up a house through foreclosure.    We have tried to maintain our house for almost a year.  But now the bank decided we do not qualify for modification of the loan.  We cannot refinance either because of no equity.  Now we are facing the reality of having to move out eventually.  Friends and family have suggested to fight this until the end. Appeal, hire a lawyer, try to stay as long as possible.  The bank, of course, is offering a short sale, or deed four lease, which both entail giving up the house.  Nevertheless ( I don’t want to make this strictly about economy and mortgages), we have looked at this situation from a spiritual point of view.  Initially I thought about how much I hate having to pack all of our stuff and move to a different place.  I hate moving, I have done it too many times.  I hate having to go through the tedious process of looking for an apartment or renting house and move there.  Having to relocate, maybe farther away from schools, a less safe neighborhood, noisy neighbors.  I like owing my house (if I can say that) and taking care of the house my way.  At the same time, we question ourselves “Is God giving us a fresh start? Does He want us to move on?  If you have read my previous posts, you know that my main theme is about simplifying, serving others, and surrendering.   Since I strongly believe in these principles, which helps me to live the Kingdom of Heaven, is God giving us this opportunity to surrender to his will of moving out of our comfortable house?  Does he want us to simplify our lives by moving to a smaller, more humble place like an apartment?  And are these steps necessary in order for us to be able to serve others?  Does God want us to “empty ” ourselves by moving to a less convenient residence?  It is strange to us that, even if we initially thought about how terrible it would be to be forced out of our house, we are now simultaneously thinking and feeling that we are not really attached to a building.  As long as we are healthy and united, we will be fine.  This is truly our goal.  House or no house, what counts is a strong home.  I say it is strange because I did not think this way, but we both are in “peace”.  Is this a way for God to let us know that this is His will?  foreclosure


About Noel

I am a person who has realized that this existence is an opportunity to engage in the genuine care and service of others. I have evolved from fundamentalism to a moderate spiritual approach. I am an introvert, an artist, and a a reflecting person who has grown to not fear doubt but to embrace it as a means to growth and increasing closeness to the fullness of life. View all posts by Noel

2 responses to “To Give Up or Not to Give Up?

  • Cindy Holman

    I’m so sorry to hear about this – but you’re right Maybe this is an answer – you just don’t know the question yet. I am a firm believer in things not just happening – but happening for a reason. I believe that God will eventually show you what that something else is. We’ve been in a similar situation in some early years of our marriage when living in Juneau, Alaska. We needed to move and couldn’t sell our condo – we eventually ended up doing a turning it back to the bank “in lieu of foreclosure”. It was a tough time – but we needed to move and I’m glad that we were able to get out of a sticky situation. You will know in time what to do – maybe it is just to simplify – but what a way to go, right?

  • Carol Ann Hoel

    You and your wife have your priorities right, Noel. God will lead you and bless you. I like the way you put it: “As long as we are healthy and united, we will be fine.” Blessings to you…

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